VAV Healthy Relationships
Building healthy patterns early in your relationship can establish a solid foundation Focus on all the considerate things your partner says and does. . Do your best to treat your partner in a way that says, "I love you and trust you, and I want. Relationship experts will tell you the reason their relationships thrive is with others, and especially a partner, mirrors their relationship with self. Many people use this time and go on to develop healthy relationships. Good family relationships help your children feel secure and loved. Here's how to build relationships with quality time, communication, teamwork it's good for your relationship with your partner to have this quality time together. Create family rules that state clearly how your family wants to look after and treat its members.
Most couples will encounter some issues upon which they will never completely agree. Rather than continuing a cycle of repeated fights, agree to disagree and negotiate a compromise or find a way to work around the issue. Distinguish between things you want versus things you need from your partner. For example, for safety reasons, you might need your partner to remember to pick you up on time after dark. But calling you several times a day may really only be a "want.
A clear message involves a respectful but direct expression of your wants and needs. Take some time to identify what you really want before talking to your partner.
Work on being able to describe your request in clear, observable terms. For example, you might say, "I would like you to hold my hand more often" rather than the vague, "I wish you were more affectionate.
What are you looking for?
It can be tempting to list your concerns or grievances, but doing so will likely prolong an argument. Do your best to keep the focus on resolving one concern at a time.
Being a good listener requires the following: You might start this process with: Research has found that couples who "edit" themselves and do not say all the angry things they may be thinking are typically the happiest. Adopt a "Win-Win" Position. A "win-win" stance means that your goal is for the relationship, rather than for either partner, to "win" in a conflict situation. Holding on to unrealistic expectations can cause a relationship to be unsatisfying and to eventually fail.
The following will help you to distinguish between healthy and problematic relationship expectations: What you want from a relationship in the early months of dating may be quite different from what you want after you have been together for some time. Anticipate that both you and your partner will change over time. Feelings of love and passion change with time, as well. Respecting and valuing these changes is healthy.
Love literally changes brain chemistry for the first months of a relationship. For both physiological and emotional reasons, an established relationship will have a more complex and often richer type of passion than a new relationship.
It is difficult, but healthy, to accept that there are some things about our partners that will not change over time, no matter how much we want them to. Unfortunately, there is often an expectation that our partner will change only in the ways we want. We may also hold the unrealistic expectation that our partner will never change from the way he or she is now. Express Wants and Needs. While it is easy to assume that your partner knows your wants and needs, this is often not the case and can be the source of much stress in relationships.
A healthier approach is to directly express our needs and wishes to our partner. Respect Your Partner's Rights. It is unrealistic to expect or demand that that he or she have the same priorities, goals, and interests as you. Be Prepared to "Fight Fair.
Healthy couples fight, but they "fight fair" - accepting responsibility for their part in a problem, admitting when they are wrong, and seeking compromise. Additional information about fair fighting can be found here.
Someone who doesn't yet have this part down may need to work on it with a trained therapist before he or she is ready for a relationship. Meanwhile, even though you might feel bad or feel for someone who's been mistreated, you need to take care of yourself — it's not healthy to stay in a relationship that involves abusive behavior of any kind.
Warning Signs When a boyfriend or girlfriend uses verbal insults, mean language, nasty putdowns, gets physical by hitting or slapping, or forces someone into sexual activity, it's a sign of verbal, emotional, or physical abuse. These aren't the only questions you can ask yourself.
If you can think of any way in which your boyfriend or girlfriend is trying to control you, make you feel bad about yourself, isolate you from the rest of your world, or — this is a big one — harm you physically or sexually, then it's time to get out, fast.
Let a trusted friend or family member know what's going on and make sure you're safe. But even if you know that the person hurting you loves you, it is not healthy. Ever heard about how it's hard for someone to love you when you don't love yourself? It's a big relationship roadblock when one or both people struggle with self-esteem problems.
Your girlfriend or boyfriend isn't there to make you feel good about yourself if you can't do that on your own. Focus on being happy with yourself, and don't take on the responsibility of worrying about someone else's happiness.
What if you feel that your girlfriend or boyfriend needs too much from you? If the relationship feels like a burden or a drag instead of a joy, it might be time to think about whether it's a healthy match for you. Someone who's not happy or secure may have trouble being a healthy relationship partner.
Also, intense relationships can be hard for some teens. Some are so focused on their own developing feelings and responsibilities that they don't have the emotional energy it takes to respond to someone else's feelings and needs in a close relationship.
Don't worry if you're just not ready yet. You will be, and you can take all the time you need. Ever notice that some teen relationships don't last very long? It's no wonder — you're both still growing and changing every day. You might seem perfect for each other at first, but that can change. If you try to hold on to the relationship anyway, there's a good chance it will turn sour.
Better to part as friends than to stay in something that you've outgrown or that no longer feels right for one or both of you. Trust This is a big one.
All healthy relationships require mutual and unguarded trust between partners. Steadfast affection, support, respect, and communication will naturally strengthen the trust in your relationship. Support One of the best things about being in a healthy relationship is having a supportive partner who you know has your back.
How to Build Relationship Equality
They will be protective of you, but not overly possessive. They will encourage you to spend time with friends and family, work toward your personal goals and have a life outside of your relationship. Ultimately, an unhealthy relationship is based on power and control, not love and respect.